April 5, 2005

• Disconnected
  Whether it’s a electric notice or relationship this is a word that everyone hates.  Parents above everyone else needs to stay connected to their children.  We were watching a movie called “Odd Girl Out”.  It was a story of a group of teenage girls totally disconnecting with one girl.  During commercials I asked my teenager several questions.  One question:  Why would a teen not want to include the parent when they go through problems.  Her answer had two parts: 1.  Afraid the parent would overreact and make the situation worse.  2.  Afraid that the parent would lecture instead of listen.   

  
  

  Dr Dobson suggests in his book, “Raising Boys” to use the first 5 minutes of a relationship with encouraging words.  Yes parents are busy but they’re not that busy.  I’ve found I have less problems with my kids if I truly connect with them.  It’s not easy but it’s worth it. 

  
  

  Former first lady Hillary Rodham Clinton told a story about her father, who never affirmed her as a child.  When she was in high school, she brought home a straight-A report card.  She showed it to her dad, hoping for a word of commendation.  Instead, he said, “Well, you must be attending an easy school.” Thirty-five years later the remark still burns in Mrs. Clinton’s mind.  His thoughtless response may have represented nothing more than a casual quip, but it created a point of pain that has endured to this day.
  

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