February 12, 2011
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Gossip
I’m reading this book right now called Listen. It’s about a town that has someone recording private conversations and posting it on a web site. The people are turning on each other. It makes for a lot of interesting senarios. It made me wonder how people would change if everything was made public. Some of these conversations were between husbands and wives. It was temperary venting. One particular husband said he was just upset about the neighbors and needed to vent. He vented to his wife and it was made public. He never meant any of the things he said. Is it ever ok to talk about someone else?
Is it OK to talk about some one else to your mate or close friend in order to “get through a situation”?
Is it OK to talk about someone one else in order to find out how they are doing?
Is there any situation that makes it OK to talk about someone else? People you know or famous people
Comments (14)
For the most part no, I do not even like asking questions much to the annoyance of my friends!!
Depending on what you are talking about, but usually no. However, it seems like human nature to vent once in a while (because without venting, you can destroy yourself from the inside out).
@andreasiscrazy - interesting – friends get annoyed
@laytexduckie - Agreed – Venting helps me work out differences.
I think it’s okay to talk about someone else to see how they’re doing because that obviously (probably) means they can’t ask the person themselves. I’m in a situation like that. An old friend changed and was horrible to me, but always asks how I’m doing. I don’t think he deserves an answer after all he put me through. Friends have told me he talks about me, seeing if I’m doing well. I know I should talk to him when he cares, but it’s randim that he cares so I don’t care for him.
Lucy and I had a dear mother that refused to ever say anything about anyone else to us. She may have to our Dad, but I doubt it. What is said behind closed doors should remain private especially between spouses. E. Roosevelt had a great saying which I plan to post Monday as my Monday quote that one could apply to your post.
@jennylovve - There are just some people that like to cause problems – I say very little to those people
@Dominie - Totally agree. I say things to my wife that helps me process another relationship. She does the same with me.
I dislike hurtful gossip. I have in the past had someone tell me about gossip someone had said about me. I told them the person who originally said something bad about me was BS for doing that, and they themselves were BS for repeating it to me.
@lonelywanderer2 - I believe if someone is maliciously talking about someone to me, that person will talk to someone else about me.
I think people need other people to vent to. Like a spouse or close friend. I think thats totally different from gossiping.
@bethro78 - I agree.
My opinion on your three questions would be this; I think its ok to vent to a spouse or good friend just to make things more clear. Your second would be more tricky, I have done this sometimes when I wanted to see how someone was doing I would talk about them (in a nice way) to see if all was alright about them. As long as its not bad talking. Your last one goes back to the first two. Sometimes you have to talk about some one in order to vent or to have that other person set you straight on situations, but talking bad about someone is really never a good idea because it can get misinterpreted.
Scripture tells us to go to the one you have a problem with 1st. Many many problems have resulted in going to others 1st. Sometimes I think it best to give some thought and prayer about a situation even before burdening your mate with it. Kind of a “need to know” basis and what good would it do. It takes 2 to gossip, one to talk , the other to listen. We don’t need a blueprint to know the difference about inquiring about someone else’s well being and the urge to gossip which is usually to hurt someone’s character and dished out with a sense of urgency.Good topic Randy.